new year's eve

Two years ago, O and I got storm stayed at his dad's on New Year's Eve. I woke up the next morning sick as a dog. Head pounding, coughing, fever. O's dad made me fresh squeezed grapefruit juice and I lay under a pile of blankets until 3:00 in the afternoon, when buses started running and we made our way home. Took forever to get back to O's apartment, and the trip was made longer when, in my delirium, I got off at the wrong stop and had to trudge and extra two blocks in knee deep snow.

This year... another storm. All would have been well except at 7:30 this morning, I poked myself in the eye in my sleep. This might seem like a freak accident, but because I sleep with my eyes half open, it actually happens fairly often. Usually, I get a bit of blanket or pillow in the eye, but today it was a finger, nail straight in. Total killer. By 9am, it wasn't any better, so we trudged through knee deep snow to the bus, and headed to to walk-in clinic. Which was closed due to the weather. A long wait for the bus home, more trudging.

Mid-afternoon now. Eye is somewhat better, but I'm sure I've scratched it. O has just come in from shovelling, full of stories of neighbors who let the snow get the best of their tempers. An altercation with a huge bobcat driver in the back lane that I totally missed. Car has been dug out, dinner is on. Off we go to feast and celebrate the beginning of the new year.

last post before christmas

I'm sitting here with my belly totally stuffed (too many treats at the office) and my wallet empty. 'Tis the season! Probably there will be lots of moaning over the next couple of weeks. Ooooooh.... why did I eat so much? Why did I spend so much?

Funny thing this year is that like most other Canadians, I talked about how I was cutting back. And then didn't. I mean, I did cut back on the number of people that I exchanged gifts with, and I bought fewer gifts, and I made a bunch of them. But I ended up not cutting back on my spending. I bought a few expensive things (not all of them gifts, I admit!) that I hadn't intended to, and as usual I waited until way too late to mail packages and could no longer send them by the cheaper ground mail. Considering that I plan for Christmas all year long, there is no excuse for it.

So, my New Year's resolution is a double diet. At least for January. As of January 2nd, I resolve to not eat cookies, dips, chips, almond bark or any other treats that come my way. I also resolve to not buy anything.

Was inspired by this article which was linked on The Worsted Witch's site. I'll try it for one month, basically following their rules, except I'm going to try not to buy anything except food and two bus tickets to Winnipeg. Since it is only for 30 days, I won't be in need of any new/used clothing, bedding, toilet brushes, etc. Come February... well, we'll see how January goes. In any case, this is more in response to my tight budget than for any environmental or voluntary simplicity reasons. Though those are good too. Just need to give my wallet a rest.

Hope you all have a happy and peaceful holiday!

i hate everybody

ya. you heard me. want to make an issue of it? that's right... i even hate you. just thought i'd get in a quick post while i'm waiting for my sushi pick-up and tell you that.

but tomorrow, at 11am, i will love everybody. love! love! love!

stress does funny things to people. even after a calming yoga class, i'm still feeling very grouchy and mean. pourquoi? exam. tomorrow. 9am.

but tomorrow, at 11am, i will be done all my coursework on my undergrad degree. done! done! done!

and, while perhaps not stress-free, i'll at least be a lot less stressed. o is very much looking forward to 11am tomorrow. and quite frankly, so am i.

so no comments until then, please. can't guarantee you won't get a snarky one back. ;]

not just another day

It started out typically enough. Woke up at 6am, hit snooze a dozen times, made coffee, sat in front of my SAD light for half an hour, ate breakfast, listened to CBC, went to the bathroom and threw up.

Okay, that last one was a lie.

But that's what I felt like doing. I was so giddy this morning I was making myself sick. Have been nauseous and unable to eat all day. And no, I don't have the flu and I'm not pregnant.

Here is the truth...

Woke up at 6am, hit snooze three times, made coffee, sat in front of my SAD light for half an hour, ate breakfast, listened to CBC, got dressed and walked in -33 weather to my last class. If that doesn't seem like a big deal, let me say it again.... my last class. At BU. Ever. Six years after attending my first class there, I have finally attended the last one. Okay, still have a thesis to complete (er... start... ahem) and I write an exam next Tuesday. But never again will I sit in a darkened lecture theatre listening to a prof bla-bla-blah. At least not on this little campus.

Seems like a big deal. I want to celebrate. Instead, going to yoga, then home to make dinner and study. All these will be done with a huge grin on my face. So happy. Sooooo happy!

the plural of mouse is mice

Elliot isn't the only one with a mouse problem. Though, in reality, mine is more of a cat problem. On Saturday, I picked up what I thought was a dead mouse in order to put a stop to the insane cat fight that was going on in the kitchen. Turned out the cats were so busy fighting each other for the wee rodent that neither of them actually killed it. The poor thing was petrified, and suddenly, I found that I had inadvertantly rescued it from certain (eventual) death. I let it recover and dry off for an hour in a granola bar box, at which point my dear friend Craig showed up. Thank goodness for farm boys! He a) confirmed that it was not a deer mouse and therefore I didn't need to worry about Hanta virus, b) said that it might live if I put it outside, and most importantly c) said he'd take care of it. In my mind, that darling mouse is living happily ever after in the unmowed grass by the dumpster. And needless to say, I bought Craig a coffee.

Today, I received this email from my dad (and for those of you who don't know my dad, this is a pretty typical email):

Hi Catherine and Colin,
Just a few words to let you know ,I' m still basking in sunny California, 23 CEL today and sunny ,no wind,wish you were here, I need a visit, you are too far away.
Going to Honolulu Jan 26th for 2 weeks from Victoria ,three days in Victoria before then. Keeping busy killing gophers with Cianide pills in their hole in the ground and a little water, and poof ,gone, also dancing and golfing.
Love Dad

So, my question is (and mom, if you're reading, perhaps you can offer some insight), how can I possibly be related to this man?!? It's the last sentence that particularly confounds me. And repulses me. It's a mystery. Unless my mom has something she needs to tell me about the mailman? Mom?

fat is a state of mind

Two disclaimers:
1) I am in no way complaining or even implying that I am fat. I am smack-dab in the middle of the healthy weight range according to the BMI, and I am fully aware of that.
2) I know that there is a medical definition of fat, and that it isn't just related to how you feel about yourself.

That said, 10 weeks into school, I feel fat. I sit all day at a computer, and spend much of my evenings sitting at a desk. I'm working extra hours to make up the time that I've taken off to sit in a classroom. I usually walk to work, but now I'm driving three days a week because I can't make it from the university to the hospital in 10 minutes. My diet is terrible because I have so little spare time to shop and cook. And so, I feel sluggish and flabby and unhappy with my body.

It's horrible.

But I'm not looking for sympathy. I know everyone feels like this sometimes. I also know that, how I'm feeling aside, I've got it pretty good. I've always been a size medium, even if right now I'm not a happy medium (haha) .

Trying to take some action to get myself out of this funk. Have signed up for yoga on Monday evenings with my sis. Have actually been to the gym a couple of times lately, though my bunion is holding me back a bit (yes, bunion.... more on that another time). And heading home to make chili to go with the corn muffins I whipped up yesterday. And maybe lift weights, we'll see. That's basically all I can do except hang in there for 3 more weeks. Once this semester is over, my time should be a bit more flexible and I'll be able to take care of myself better.

Until then.... I want my mommy. And guess what? She's taking me out for dinner on Thursday. Not that going out for dinner will help with the feeling fat issue. I'll probably order fries or pizza or something. But at least I'll feel taken care of.

Andre Ethier - Part 2

O. convinced me on Wednesday that I should buy the new Andre Ethier CD. What's the worst that could happen? he asked. Let's see... I could be supremely disappointed. That would take the shine off his first CD, which has brought me so much foot tappin' joy. I often avoid buying anything else out of fear of disappointment, be it books or music, if I'm really into one thing a person has done. So what about Secondathallum? Does it live up to the first? Sadly, not quite.

Good stuff first. The production on this album is great. The overall sound is quite different. Same rollickin', let's-hop-a-boxcar feel as the first, but big. Horns, organ, piano... Bold, lush and baudy. Ethier clearly styles himself after other singers who can't sing. I'm not sure if it's because I also can't sing, but I'm drawn to voices like his. Except for Cohen. Never been a big fan of his monotone style. In any case, really dig Ethier's delivery. Love the swagger, love the growls, love the bittersweet high notes.

So far, you are thinking, it sounds pretty great. What's the problem? For me, the big problem on this album is the songwriting. I don't really know anything about Ethier, but I'm speculating that he's had some relationship issues between the first and this one. It is all about love, which is fine, but I found myself getting a little bored. Not that love is boring, but he seems to have limited things to say about it. Also found his overuse of the phrase "little girl" quite irritating. Same with the honey/honey bee thing. Unlike the first CD, there are some really weak songs on this one. Despite the Stooges reference, Now I Want to Be Your Dad is one of them. And though I love Nick Cave, In With the Prim just doesn't do it for me. The last song sends the album out with a whimper. And any song that starts with the aforementioned "little girl" has been getting the skip.

Don't rush out and buy it. If I ever get an MP3 player, I'll be downloading about four songs, then it's bye-bye.

three years less a day

Tomorrow is the 3rd anniversary of the date that went something like this:

I had an appointment in the morning with my handsome and wonderful dentist, Dr. Dulat. After getting scraped and cleaned and having four caps applied, I went to pick up O at his apartment. We hadn't seen each other for five years, and that last meeting, after a free performance his band did in Old Market Square, was awkward and brief. Much like the other sporatic meetings we had had over the years since we called our two-year relationship quits back in 1991.

I was pretty nervous and excited when I rang his doorbell. So much so that I actually rang his neighbor's doorbell by mistake. We then headed out for lunch at Niko's. It was non-stop blah blah blah. A lot of catching up to do. Lunch was done, but we weren't. It was a glorious November day, so he walked with me to the Village, where I had to go to buy a tin toy robot for my brother-in-law's birthday. Then we walked back to the car. We still weren't done, so we went for coffee at Bar Italia. Many hours passed and it became dinner time. We went to Sushi Train at the Forks. And finally, when it couldn't be put off any longer, I dropped him off at home. We kissed in his doorway, I got into my little blue car and hit the highway.

One the drive back to Brandon, my floor mat got caught under the accelerator pedal. I leaned down to yank it back into place and crunched over the wheel, I was in the perfect position to see a shooting star blaze across the sky. I took that as a good sign.

Tomorrow, it will be the same. Dr. Dulat in the morning. Then lunch. Then a walk through the village. Then coffee. Then sushi. Then a kiss to start our next year. And then I will get into my little blue car and drive back to Brandon.

Green Drinks

sigh...

Just checked my email. Logged out and got bounced to the Sympatico/MSN site. Here are Tuesday's Features:

Global warming will harm economy (parts of the Stern report are available here)
10 gadgets your wife will love (basically, high-end techno gadgets you, the husband, can get away with buying)

And spending all that money on gadgets will be good for the economy, which will help prevent the economic devastation that could be caused by global warming, right? Right? I'm sure that's what the report said...

top of my chart

Latest musical obsession is Andre Ethier's first CD. All I can say is that it is a good thing my dear roommie isn't home much, because she'd be getting mighty sick of hearing the same songs over and over. While making dinner and cleaning the kitchen last night, I literally kept hitting play everytime the disk ended. Hooked, I tell ya.

The songs are a lot like Bob Dylan (with a hint of Nick Cave a la Murder Ballads), if Bob lived during the Depression and performed drunk on wooden stages in small town bars. Quite old timey and raw. Actually reminds me a bit of Leadbelly. Fave tunes at the moment are Little Saddy and Sinners.

Supposedly he has a MySpace site, but haven't been able to get it to upload, so you can try checking it out. Also, he's a painter (not really my thing) and singer in the now defunct Deadly Snakes. And he has a new CD out too, but I'm currently digging the first one so much that I haven't bothered to find out what the second one is like.

Run out and buy this now. Or stay home and download it now. Except for T - a certain husband of hers might just be getting a copy for Hanukkah. :]

two fabulous chances to prove your eco worth!

First one is from my own little city (sorry, locals participants only). Called Eco Idol, which is fine, but the judges are the Idols. I don't have tv, and I've never seen any of the Idol shows, but I was under the impression that its the contestants that are vying for the title of Idol. Am I wrong?

In any case, it is a fun little contest where you submit a picture of the green thing you do and just maybe win one of the prizes. A weekend for two at a local hotel (no gas spent to get away somewhere exotic... very eco) or green cleaning supplies. I'm going for the runner up prizes. Lord knows my house needs cleaning.

So far the entries have been a little dull. Trying to think of ways to jazz it up a bit. Suggestions welcome!

Second is something everyone can participate in... the Slate Green Challenge. Sign up, take the quiz, find out ways to lower your carbon emissions, and make the pledge to do so. The whole thing does have some problems. Like assuming that everyone owns a car and dishwasher, or that said car is powered by fossil fuel. And for us Canucks, everything has to be converted to Imperial from metric.

But overall a good (and fun) exercise in assessing one's environmental impact.

good news and bad news

The good (?) news:
Canada's Conservative government announced their proposed Clean Air Act last week, which, along with a bunch of other stuff, aims to reduce greenhouse gases by 45 to 65% from 2003 levels by 2050.

The bad news:
The World Wildlife Fund just released a report predicting that we will have exhausted the Earth's resources by 2050.

beautiful

Elliot posted last week about beauty and linked to the Dove "evolution" commercial. Even though I don't use Dove products and I know in my cynical little heart that commercials like these are just another advertising ploy, I felt quite moved watching it.

Beauty is something it took me years to get a handle on. I was an oblivioius child, concentrating entirely on doing stuff, rather than on what other people looked like. Or at least that's how I remember it. When I entered junior high and was confronted with my apparently unappealing looks, I was sideswiped. I had no idea how ugly I was until people started telling me. What a blow.

I was not even close to coming to terms with my appearance when, at age 23, I was diagnosed with Grave's disease. I was also unlucky enough to be one of the 10% of people who get the associated eye problems, though not to the severe extent that afflicts some.

After two years of explaining to strangers why my eyes looked "weird", something changed. I turned 25 and slowly, without trying, I stopped caring what other people thought of my appearance. (Not that I don't still find it annoying when I get asked.)

I can't explain it fully, but several factors helped. First, I stopped buying magazines. Second, I didn't have a television and have actually spent most of my adult life without one. Point being that I'm not constantly comparing myself to some idea of beauty that I can never achieve.

Third, I came to really appreciate the meaningful relationships I had with my bestest friends and sought their guidance. I still want to look good, of course. But for me.

Fourth, I grew up. Funny about that.

Fifth, I went back to school. I was a mediocre student all my life, but mainly because I didn't try. Now that I cared about what I was learning and started getting excellent marks, I felt better about myself. I got this big ol' brain... surely that's more important than being pretty?

Sixth, I had to deal with my mom having breast cancer. Watching her go through the slash and burn that we currently call treatment made me reconsider the order of importance of things in my life. Looks were way down the list.

And finally, I got rid of a huge monkey off my back (y'all know who I'm talking about). He was seriously dragging me down and purposely trying to wreck my confidence. It sort of worked. But not long after he was out of my life, I realized what an idjit he was. And what an idjit I had been to stay with him. Have a goofy amount of confidence now. Possibly unwarranted. :]

And while I may feel good about myself, and I don't stress about what strangers think of me, there has been some fallout from being nicknamed Uglor, and having my appearance be the thing I was so severely judged on. I don't like having my picture taken (I never turn out to be as lovely as my internal picture) or being singled out for anything. I still maintain high walls, so it's hard to get to know new people, and I often don't want to share my feelings.

On the plus side, I'm independent, self-sufficient, have a strong sense of self. I think I'm a bit protected from consumer culture because I'm so aware of its harmful effects.

In any case, I can't change the past.

I know I'm not pretty or cute. 150 years ago, I would have been called a handsome woman. I think those who love me would say I'm beautiful, and the rest are not opinions that I count. And even though I reached this place without the help of a Dove commercial, and I know exactly what they're up to, I'm still glad that they started their Real Beauty campain.

headaches

I have a major headache today. A combination of too much screen time (all day at work, all evening doing school stuff, basically for the past two weeks) and the constant drilling and banging happening on the other side of my wall. Have no idea what they are doing, but hope it stops soon. Was cataloguing a book on noise in the workplace yesterday, and there was a picture of someone with their hands over their ears. Caption read, "Noise can cause stress and anxiety." Showed my boss. She laughed. She shares the same wall.

Also finding the Brandon election to be a bit of a headache. And an embarassement. We made national news because it is such a joke. One mayoral candidate has been convicted of fraud, two currently have charges pending (assault for one; assult & break and entry for the other). Of the three remaining, one made a complete ass of herself during the debate last night. Oh ya, and the one with the b&e charge said she'd pray to God for guidance if elected. Normally, I wouldn't concern myself with these antics, but I'm really afraid that the guy convicted of fraud could win. And man, I don't want that to happen. Can't stand the guy. You know that character on the Simpsons who always cries, "But what about the children?" Well, that's basically his approach to everything. I don't think I could stand four years of his hysterics.

Final headache is my Green Brandon blog, which I have decided to shut down. Not just move this time. eBrandon sucks. The guy running it has to preview everything before it goes up, so there is always a big lag time. Half the time you have to email him to remind him. He seldom replies, and the last problem I've been having hasn't been fixed. So in order to keep you all as my friends, please look to the left and note the blue greenie link under the blogs heading. That's where I'm going to be writing enviro stuff. This blog will stay personal. Will make a note on Green Brandon that I've moved.

couch for sale

further to my previous post

Was reading today on the Health Canada website that as of November 16, 2006, all cosmetic and personal care products sold in Canada must contain the list of ingredients on the label.

This is good news for several reasons. First, people like my co-worker who reacts to aloe vera, will have an easier time avoiding ingredients that cause them problems. Second, cosmetic companies may have to start defending what is in their products and maybe, hopefully ensuring that their products are not harmful. And third, for slightly paranoid folks like myself, I can look for key ingredients (such a parabens, PEG, propylene glycol, etc. etc.) that have been linked to cancer or other health problems... AND THEN AVOID THEM.

Hurray!

put on a little make-up, make-up

So here's the thing...

Doing my thesis on the corporatization of breast cancer (that's the short description of the project and trust me, you are going to get sick of hearing me talk about it) and therefore have been reading a ton of articles. One of the main points that keeps coming up is how the focus of corporate campaigns is on finding a cure, rather than on prevention. And the suggested conclusions are that (a) corporations don't want to prevent breast cancer (or cancer, period) because too much money can be made from treating it, and (b) companies use lots of chemicals that have been linked to cancer and don't want to be held accountable.

Case in point is the cosmetics industry. They are chock full of potentially cancer-causing agents such as parabens, phthalates, and thousands of other unregulated chemicals. That's right... unregulated. The cosmetic industry does have standards, but they do not need to list what ingredients are in their products, and the vast majority of chemicals used have not been tested. The cosmetic industry defends itself by saying that these chemicals are used in such small quantities that they are not harmful. However, no studies have been done on long-term use or cumulative effects.

So...

Because I'm growing out of being a freaky girl and into being a crazy old lady (currently in the transition stage), I've stopped wearing make-up. It's not a hard and fast rule, but I no longer apply powder, blush and lipstick every morning. I think I'll still be inclined to use lipstick on occassion, and to use the rest of it when I'm dressing up. I have good skin, so I'm lucky. And it has been even better since I stopped using these products about a month ago. I know I never wore much anyway. Maybe you're shocked to learn that I wore any at all. Those of you who see me in person can judge for yourselves, and be honest, could you tell that I wasn't wearing make-up the last time you saw me? Didja even notice??

And now, some websites for further education, if you are so inclined:

CBC Marketplace - Cosmetics and the Cancer Connection
Breast Cancer Action - Cosmetics Companies and Breast Cancer
Environmental Working Group - Skin Deep (just click "No Thanks" to get into the site)
Environmental Health Association of NS -Guide to Less Toxic Producs (permanently linked on the left)

One last thing...
Do hair metal bands, drag queens and Elizabeth Taylor know about this?

bliss

Had a fantastic weekend at the lake with O. Caught a glimpse of the life that I would like to have. But probably won't ever quite have. No clocks, no news, no schedule, no stress. Plenty of food (Thanksgiving dinner courtesy of my amazing mama). Good company. Hockey Night in Canada. Coyote, deer, bison, owl. Coffee. Campfire. Discussions ranging from the trivial (do mice hibernate?) to the profound (where do we go from here?).

Finished reading The Lover (again). Did not do any school work.

Dreamed.

bits and pieces

O and I are heading to Johnson Cabins at Clear Lake for the long weekend. Very much looking forward to getting away, even though I have to do work while I'm there. At least "Geophysics" will be accompanied by glass of wine and a roaring fire.

My new bed (the Organic Eco-Rest) arrived today and hallelujah is all I have to say. It has been a year since I decided I was going to buy one, and more than three months since it was ordered. I'm sure it was worth the wait. Won't get to try it out until Monday, so I've blocked off the cat door to my bedroom and shut the door. Don't want it covered in fur before I even get to lay down on it!

And finally, I learned something new today. Lady bugs, those oh so cute and beneficial insects, overwinter in dry sheltered places, all huddled together. Apparently, though who knows how they know, they snuggle down deeper when the winter is going to a cold one. They do a kind of group hug thing, and the ones in the middle move to the outside once they warm up, so everyone stays nice and cozy. So now you know too.

Happy Thanksgiving!

summer reading list - update

Way back in April, I posted my summer reading list. How'd I do? Read some of 'em. And a bunch of others. Here's what I accomplished along with very short reviews.

Read (from the list):
Charming Billy by Alice McDermott
Read it if you have the time. Won the somethingerother prize. Enjoyed it, but didn't love it.
Last Crossing by Guy Vanderhague
Read it, read it, read it! Got off to a slowish start, but by the fifth chapter, I couldn't put it down.
Oh, Play That Thing by Roddy Doyle
Don't bother. Very disappointing. Crackling prose, as usual, but a plot that would put General Hospital to shame. I mean, how many things can happen to one person?!? Sheesh.

Read (not from the list):
Grub: Ideas for an Urban Organic Kitchen by Anna Lappe and Terry Bryant
Read it, read it, read it! Straightforward and sage (haha) advice about that most important subject – food. Plus lots of yummy recipes. Also check out their website.
Reviving Ophelia by Mary Bray Pipher
Read it if you have daughters or were ever a girl. Some scary stuff about growing up female in these media saturated times, but for me, it was better than going to a therapist. And cheaper. Worked out a lot of issues left over from my terrible teens while pondering the author's words of wisdom.
Madame Zee by Pearl Luke
Read it if you have nothing better to do. Interesting story based on the real-life mistress of a Canadian cult leader, but not super writing and the ending was a bit unsatisfying.
Out: A Novel by Natsuo Kirino
Don't bother. Loved this book, got totally sucked in to the grim and gritty tale of four Japanese women who work the night shift in a box lunch factory. One murders her husband, and the other three help her dispose of the body. Then things get crazy. A novel about alienation and the low status of women in Japanese society. But the last chapter was so terrible that I was literally shrieking. How can ten pages totally ruin an entire novel? Read it only if you want to find out.
The Red Tent by Anita Diamant
Read it if you have the time. Not generally big of faux biographies (though this is the second one I read this summer), but so little is known of Dinah, the biblical daughter of Jacob (ya, the guy who wore the amazing, technicolour.... ), that I found myself really enjoying “her” story.

comfort food

Feeling a little down lately. Not sure why. The days getting shorter? Lack of sleep? School? Whatever the reason, I feel like going home, getting in my jammies, making something yummy and curling up with a cat and a book. Unfortunately, the book is "Geophysics".

On the bright side, this is the something yummy that I'm planning to make:

Mushroom Risotto
1 ounce dried porcini mushrooms
2 cups boiling water
1 1/2 pounds fresh cremini or white mushrooms
6 tablespoons unsalted butter
5 to 6 cups mushroom broth
1 cup finely chopped onion
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh rosemary leaves
1 tablespoon finely chopped fresh sage leaves
3 cups Arborio rice
2 cups dry red wine
3 tablespoons finely chopped fresh parsley leaves
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan

In a small bowl soak porcini in boiling water 30 minutes. Pour soaking liquid through a fine sieve lined with a dampened paper towel or coffee filter into a bowl and reserve. Wash porcini under cold water to remove any grit and pat dry. Chop porcini fine.

Chop fine 1/4 pound cremini or white mushrooms (about 1 1/2 cups) and reserve. Depending on size, halve and/or quarter remaining 1 1/4 pounds cremini or white mushrooms and in a large heavy skillet cook in 4 tablespoons butter with salt and pepper to taste over moderate heat, stirring, until tender, 5 to 10 minutes. Remove skillet from heat and reserve mushrooms in skillet. (They will be reheated just before serving.)

In a large saucepan heat broth and keep at a bare simmer.

In a 5- to 6-quart heavy saucepan add reserved finely chopped cremini or white mushrooms, remaining 2 tablespoons butter, onion, rosemary, sage, and salt and pepper to taste and cook, stirring, until onion is softened. Stir in rice and cook, stirring, until coated well with fat, about 1 minute. Add 1 cup wine and cook, stirring constantly, until absorbed. Add remaining cup wine and cook, stirring constantly, until absorbed.

Add 1 cup simmering broth and cook, stirring constantly, until absorbed. Continue cooking and adding broth, 1/2 cup at a time, stirring constantly and letting each addition be absorbed before adding next, until rice is tender and creamy-looking but still al dente, 20 to 25 minutes.
Note: About halfway through cooking, add reserved porcini soaking liquid and chopped porcini, stirring constantly until liquid is absorbed, and continue cooking and adding broth in same manner.

During last few minutes of cooking, reheat reserved cremini or white mushrooms in skillet over moderate heat, stirring, until hot, and stir in parsley and salt and pepper to taste. Stir grated Parmesan and salt and pepper to taste into risotto.

Serve risotto immediately, topped with cremini or white mushrooms and garnished with Parmesan curls and rosemary. Serves 6.

good cup, bad cup

Ahhhh. Love a clever pun.

The subject, however, is kind of serious. Especially for those of us (ie. moi) who take our coffee seriously. Was reading this report, put out by the Centre for Science in the Public Interest, on the amount of fat and calories in specialty coffee. Quite horrifying.

Fortunately for me, I don't have to change my habits. I always order a large latte with skim milk, no sugar. And no whip cream, sprinkles, etc.

Can probably thank Bruce for that. It's weird how often I can think of things to thank him for. Maybe because adversity has made me a much stronger person. And a kinder, more forgiving person too, I think.

But back to the coffee. Years ago, in the impressionable days of my youth, artschoolcool Bruce made me many, many cups of coffee. Cafe au lait done the real French way. Probably taught to him by his real French mother. Coffee press, scalded milk. Then he got a espresso machine and we moved on to lattes. Many, many lattes. Good, real European-style lattes, not the dessert coffee that so many places sell.

I never developed a taste for sweet coffee (though near the end of our relationship, Bruce insisted on putting large spoons of sugar in my cup... won't go into the psychology of that just now) but I did develop a taste for fresh, slightly bitter, piping hot java.

More recently, I also developed a taste for fair trade, organic coffee. Things at age 19 that never occurred to me I should consider. Now that's all I drink at home. Having coffee out is a bit trickier. Starbucks is North America's largest purchaser of fair trade coffee (according to them) but if you buy a coffee at Starbucks, it probably isn't fair trade unless you ask for it. Here in Brandon, even asking for it isn't necessarily enough. They sell the beans, but don't expect them to brew up a pot just because you want some. The Organic Consumers Association is urging action to challenge Starbucks to live up to their propaganda. I just don't bother going to Starbucks, period.

Milk? Well that's another post entirely. But there is some scary info on the OCA site if you're interested.

grrrr, and, uh... yay!

My sweet little former foster dog, Hansel, is coming back. The stoopid family that adopted him has now returned him. Crazy people. I don't think they actually realized what having a dog was all about. They said they didn't want to keep him because they felt bad because they had to keep him in his crate all the time. Why did they have to do that, you ask? Well, because he had an accident, so they had to keep him in there during the day. That's right... AN accident. And then they had to keep him in the crate at night because their daughter wanted to sleep with him and they were afraid he would bite her if she moved around in her sleep. *sigh* Sometimes people just drive me batty.

But the good news is that Hansel is coming back. Gentle, adorable, easy-going Hansel will be my temporary dog again. Very excited to be picking him up on Monday and I don't mind at all if no one wants to adopt him for a while.

i heart rufus

Rufus after he positively destroyed the cheap plastic blind

(that came with my house).

Outside

In

Who can feel angry in light of such bliss?

Last week, I had the same conversation twice in one day. The first was with my friend Jacq* about a mutual friend of ours, Cindy. Cindy, now that her life is complete (ie husband and child), no longer needs us, and we have been dumped.

The second conversation was with Tia about her friend Callie. Callie is easily distracted by a new man or whatever else is going on in her life, and Tia decided that she'd had enough of being filler, so she dumped Callie. It was a bit trickier situation, as they do occasionally work together, but Tia handled it with her usual grace. What really struck me was when Tia said that she felt sadder about Pluto losing its status as a planet than about losing her friendship with Callie.

I've been reclassifying friends for about a year now (let's just say... if you're reading this, you're not one of them). I haven't dumped anyone, but I've had to start thinking about them differently because the relationship we once had has changed into something that no longer is very meaningful. Until this conversation with Tia, I've been thinking of it as a continuum -- that is, a line with true friends on one extreme and true enemies on the other, and most people falling somewhere in between, depending on how close they are to one or the other. I've been mentally moving a few people further away from the true friend point.

But I like the planet analogy better.

Has Pluto changed, really? No. Its still out there doing its thing. What has changed is how we think about it, the amount of attention we give it. Do we hate Pluto or wish it harm? Of course not. It has simply been downgraded from true planet to dwarf planet. Much like a few people in my life have been down graded from friend to someone I used to be friends with, to acquaintance.

I felt a little weird when I started talking to Tia about this months ago. But she, being a true friend, knew exactly what I meant. We have ways in our culture to mourn death and dump lovers. There are social rules (and rules of law) for how we are to behave when we get dumped. But we lack a way to move on from friendships. Things are awkward, get messy. Unless the friend does something truly heinous, we try to spare feelings, to back away slowly, to leave them with their dignity intact. And we feel guilty for doing so. This is our friend, after all. The best we can hope for is to mutually drift apart.

But I want to move on. Not to be cold, but these dwarf planets are taking up too much time and effort. Time I will never get back, spent on something that does not nourish me. Effort that I'd rather spend on the people I love, who show that they also love me and want me to be part of their little galaxy. Who think of me as Mars, perhaps. Certainly not as Uranus.

*To protect the privacy of the real people I was talking to and about, names have been changed to the names of other people's pets.

the other one

Cleo's roommate, Rufus. Crazy cat. He likes to hide at the bottom of the stairs and jump out at you. Can ya tell?

can you believe...

...that it took me this long to post pictures of my cat?!? Picture quality isn't exactly crisp. Turns out my digital camera doesn't do extreme close-ups very well. But not complaining!

Sweet Cleo

sweet 36

I've been meaning to post about my birthday for, oh, about a month now, but I've been waiting until I had pictures available. It was really damned good this year, thanks to all the amazing people in my life who are so thoughtful and make me feel so loved.

The whole thing started in May, when I was bumming around with my sister. I pointed out a pair of amber earrings that I liked and she promptly bought them for me. Practical person that she is, she noted that she wouldn't remember which ones they were by July, and I might as well enjoy them now.

Then in June when I received a package from my favourite bugs. Technically my Christmas present, but random gifts are more exciting anyway. It contained a fabulous drawing by the big bug of an orange cat named Cosmo, who happens to look a lot like Rufus. And this apron. There are people who wear aprons and those who don't. I happen to be an apron person. And a slipper person, but that's another story. Anyway, love this gift. Using it constantly and always wishing that my dear friend was hangin' in the kitchen with me.

A little closer to the actual date, another package arrived. This one from Karen, filled with six jars of jam and jelly that she made herself. Peach (long gone), jalapeno (gone), strawberry orange (going), blueberry, raspberry and rosemary mint. She also sent a book that I've been wanting to read, but that wasn't available at the public library. Tearing through it. Will post a review when I'm done, but I can tell you now, I think you should read it.
The Thursday before the big day, I invited my friend Kana over with her husband and told her to invite anyone else she would like. Her husband was only in town for a week, so the easiest way for everyone to see him was to have a gathering. Little did I know that it would turn into a party complete with cake, ice cream and gifts for moi. Bliss. The gifts were super thoughtful, too. An invitation to dinner. Liquid kelp for my trees. A recycled rubber tire door mat. Kitchen goodies like French grey sea salt and pomegranate tea. And a good time was had by all, of course.
The weekend of was spent at Asessippi Provincial Park, on the third annual girls camping weekend. This time in a yurt. My birthday consisted of seven hours on the beach, gourmet camp food, and lots of drinks and good conversation around the campfire until 3am. Oh ya, and s'mores.

That meant missing a weekend with O. but we made up for it on August long. I always like to guess what he'll get me, and so far I've never been right. This year's tries were a dutch hoe and wind chimes. Actually got my favourite movie on DVD and a CD that I've been longing for by a band that no longer is. Includes the song I love to sing while riding my bike. Thanks, darlin'! Smoochies!

Just when I thought it was over...

Received a lovely pottery bowl from O.'s mom and yesterday I got something in the mail from Whitehorse. How's that for making it last. Let's see... May, June... five months. I used to just call it the 12 Days of Catherine. Must rethink that.

And no birthday would be complete without resolutions. This year, I have three:
1) Drink more water. (So far, not going well.)
2) Quit eating so much junk food!!! (I got into some very bad habits during school last year, but having some success with this one, except for the cake, pie and apple crisp I've eaten this week.)
3) Stop wasting so much time at work. (Um.... ya.)

i need more time

All you crafty types, check these out.

northern gothic

Ah do declare... this summer has been a steamer. So hot and dry that today, at 22C, it feels positively chilly. I managed to resist turning on the central air for the entire season. Same as last year, but then last year was the summer that never was. This summer was the kind of heat and humidity and sunshine that causes one to reach for a mint julep and Flannery O'Connor. Which is exactly how I've coped.

Oh, Flannery. Her writing blows me away. Was boring O. in the kitchen last weekend reading passages from a book of her short stories. I find her like Roddy Doyle in that her descriptions are so vivid that you don't just imagine what things look like... you smell them, feel them, taste them. She doesn't aim for your head, though she is whipsmart. She doesn't play on your heartstrings, though she is a sensitive and emotional writer. She goes straight for the gut. I carry her stories around with me for days, feeling the ache where she hit and a tightness in the throat from trying to pretend it didn't hurt. Which is why I generally try not to read to much of her writing at once. Bad for my temperment, though I love them. Especially bad when it is 38 degrees outside and hotter in.

Mint juleps have the opposite effect (perhaps that's why they go so well with Flannery), leaving me light, refreshed, giggly. Early this spring it became clear that I was going to have a bountiful mint crop, so I announced my intention to learn to make mint juleps. My friend Danette showed up for dinner one night with a bottle of Jack (bourbon doesn't come in small bottles and we didn't want to make the investment unless we liked them) and a recipe. Her first sip was too harsh, but once the ice melted a bit and the drink mellowed, she enjoyed it. I liked it from the first, and have since passed along the joys of juleps to O. We've been drinking them often (though not in great quatities), have used up the Jack and bought a bottle of Wild Turkey. Here's the recipe we've been using:

4 oz. bourbon (two doubles)
4-6 fresh mint leaves
sugar
ice

Tear the mint leave into large pieces. Combine with the sugar and crush the sugar and mint together to release the flavour. Add the bourbon and stir until the sugar has disolved. Serve over ice, while reclining in a chair under the shade of a grand tree.

customer service rant

Just so y'all don't think I do nothing but complain, I'll start this post with a funny story.

Back when I was Book Store Girl, I helped an older gentleman whose first language was not English. The details of our interaction are lost to me, but I do recall that he had an excellent experience. Was I extra charming that day? Did we simply connect in that way that strangers sometimes do? Dunno. All I know is that he sent a note of gratitude to my boss. The whole incident is foggy, but the wording of his note is burned forever in my mind, because I was razzed for weeks after. He wrote:

Miss Catherine gave me a very good service.

Ahhhh. Great. Thanks, sir. My cheeks will stop burning eventually.

Now for my (fairly mild) rant...

Remember a few weeks ago when I posted about the great clothes I picked up at Closet Chick? While I was there, I asked the owner about selling clothes on consignment. She buys outright, it turns out, and said I should phone back in August to set up an appointment. So last week I called and left a message. No reply. Monday I called again. No reply. Tonight I am phoning for the third and final time. This is what I plan to say:

Hi Lorraine. Catherine calling again. I've left two messages in the last week about setting up an appointment to sell some clothes and I haven't heard back from you. I'd like to express my disappointment at this shoddy treatment. I was really impressed by your shop, enough to tell other people about it, but I am now going around telling people about the fact that you haven't returned my calls. If you aren't buying or don't want to buy from me, I'd appreciate it if you took the time to let me know. I'm not simply trying to make money off you, I've spent money in your shop and I would like to continue to do so, but I won't support businesses that treat me poorly. If you would like to phone and apologize or offer an explanation, you may reach me at...

How's that sound?

I worked for 14 years in various retail and food service jobs. Long enough to have a healthy appreciation for the crap that clerks have to put up with. I'm quick to compliment when I get good service, both to the person and to their boss. But I also have certian expectations and I'm not afraid to complain. Constructively. Not going to freak out and yell or anything.

Being ignored is almost worse than being treated badly. Feeling very irked.

sunday

Hansel was found wandering about four blocks from my house by a woman who has five beagles. She took him to her vet, the vet tracked me down, and Hansel was back by 6:00. Which was good, because my mom was on the verge. I wasn't too worried, just hoping he hadn't been hurt. He was absolutely fine, which was a relief.

The bed... well... still feeling grumpy about that. It's like when someone holds something out to you and just when you are about to take it, they snatch it away. Will be about a month before I wake up, roll over and don't feel completely stiff and sore. Not the end of the world, I know.

The rest of the weekend has been fine. O. and I are being lazy today. Doing laundry, picking apples at my mom's, lounging on the couch, drinking coffee. Crazy big storm on Friday night. We watched it rolling in for hours and when it finally hit, it was with force. Everything was thouroughly whipped and battered. Trees are down around the city, but my wee babies managed to ride it out. My garden looks hung over... the tomatoes are begging for an asprin and another beer. The corn wants to go out for a greasy breakfast. The herbs are sleeping it off.

stoopid friday

Woke up this morning and my first thought was, "I'll never sleep on this mattress again."

HA!

My new bed was delivered today, but guess what? The box spring has a solid wood frame and would not fit up the stairs. Whole bed sent back. Contacted the store. For and extra $100 I can get a split box spring. Which is what I'm going to do. Hey... $2000, $2100.... what's the dif. I want a damned good bed and I'm willing to pay for it. But I refuse to sleep in the living room in order to have one.

By the way, I'm totally freaked out about spending that kind of money. Way outside of my usual budget, except that the work I did as a research assistant last winter paid me in one lump sum, so for once I had the dough to make a big purchase. Hate buying on credit, though sometimes I cave.

Work day was okay. Lots to do. Spent the majority of the afternoon typing book pockets and spine labels while listening to CBC.

Then my mom called about the bed. *sigh*

Then my mom called about Hansel. Martians abducted him while the furniture guys were trying to force my bed up the stairwell. He was locked in the kitchen with the cats. When my poor mom went to let him out, only the cats were there. All three doors were still shut. She checked everywhere... cupboards, fridge... back yard, basement, around the block. But no dog. It's the weirdest thing.

Even weirder is that he didn't come running when she put food in his bowl and shook it. That dog is a complete pig. I frequently catch him licking the container that the cat food is stored in.

All in all... a mediocre day gone bad.

doggie to protect me - update

The reason I haven't been posting since things calmed down socially is that I have a new reason to rush home from work every day. Meet Hansel. No, he isn't my dog. I'm fostering him for Funds for Furry Friends, a local no-kill animal rescue.

Hansel is a lovely boy, but it turns out he is useless as a guard dog. He doesn't bark and he wags at every person who walks by. So much for getting a dog to help me cope with the stress of our local crime wave.

No matter.

It's nice having him around. The cats don't seem to mind. I feel like I'm doing something good, and he has a good (temporary) home.

fear and loathing

I've been feeling very stressed out in my neighborhood this summer, but the past week has been particularly bad. A woman was raped at knife point last week near 2nd and Van Horne. I walk to and from work and pass the corner of 2nd and McTavish, and can look across the field and the tracks to the spot where it happened. The paper reported that 44 sexual assaults had occured in Brandon so far this year. I also know of other attacks that happened a couple of weeks ago that were not reported in the paper: a student at BU who was robbed and beaten on her way home from the night shift at 7-Eleven, and an 18 year old (daughter of a BU employee)was beaten by a group of girls on her way home from a friend's house.

Saturday morning, I went to the farmer's market at the Discovery Centre, about a half hour walk at my typical brisk pace. Along the way, I met four individual men and saw not one other soul until I was within sight of the market. It was one of the worst walks I've ever had. I have seldom felt so vulnerable and afraid, though I'm usually cautious and aware. Each guy pleasantly said good morning to me. I felt like punching them all just for being a man alone and encountering a woman alone. Ridiculous.

On Saturday at 11:45pm, my doorbell rang. I was alone in the house, with all the windows on the main floor open. Two young girls were at my door. I didn't answer. The ended up drinking and yelling "WOOOOO!" in the parking lot across the street until 12:30, at which point I called the cops and went to bed.

I've had a few scapes over the years, and I imagine my experiences are pretty typical. My friend and I were flashed once. I got chased by a guy outside a bar who "just wanted to talk" then started to run after me and yell obscenities when I didn't stop walking. I got my ass fondled at work by a guy who has some sort of mental illness (really, seriously has a mental illness).

In Vancouver, walking home down busy Commercial Street from Safeway, some guy on a bike grabbed my butt. I swung my groceries at him but unfortunately missed. It would have been worth the loss of my eggs to have connected. After this incident, I became consumed for weeks with revenge fantasies, to the point where I could barely sleep. I wished my bag had hit him and knocked him off his bike. Then I alternated between fantasizing about him being crushed by a passing car, or kicking the shit out of him while he lay on the ground. Even writing this now, 12 years later, I feel angry.

How dare he make me feel like this? How dare any of them make me feel afraid to walk down the street? How dare they take away my security and comfort?

I was reading today (in something unrelated to this post) a comment that said something about teaching our boys to feel abhorance to sexual violence in the way we teach abhorance to cannibalism. In other words, our whole attitude toward women and sexuality and power needs to change at a societal level before incidents such as these will start to decline. I think that is completely impossible within my lifetime, quite frankly.

I want to get an alarm system for my house. I want to get a dog. I would have a doggie to protect me, and the doggie would have a good home.

mid-July update

Lots to tell, but not much time. My baby bro and his kids leave Sunday morning, and I am trying to get in as much time with them as possible. I'm exhausted! All you mamas out there... I'm in awe of you. Don't know how you do it.

Had a good weekend in Winnipeg on the 8th and 9th. Decided to forgo Folk Fest and watch World Cup instead. Highly enjoyable and much cheaper. Spend some of the cash I saved on new used clothes at a consignment shop on Portage called Closet Chick. $29 for jeans, a dress and a shirt. Me happy.

Flew to Calgary on Monday, heavily drugged and good thing I was... the turbulence was horrible. Managed to actually hook up with my brother simply by wandering out of the airport and hoping I was in the right spot. Spent a (mostly) good three days with him, his boys, my dad and my dad's "lady friend" in Airdrie. Survived the Stampede, and have pics to prove I was there.

Had an amazingly easy trip back to Brandon. Me, brother, nephews... 12 hours in a minivan. Only two accidents (of the urinary kind), and not too much fussing from the boys or me. Has been a whirlwind of activity since we got back. Birthday BBQ, trips to Minnedosa Beach, trip to Winnipeg to see the kiddie Fringe play O is doing... Not sure what is on the agenda for tomorrow, but hoping to get some alone-time with my bro. Love the kids, but love him too and feel like we haven't had much of a chance to talk.

Spending Sunday recovering, cleaning the house and sewing. Or not. Who knows what will come up.

Quick hand-me-down update:
1) Have once again got a VCR. From my mom who got it from her cousin. I'm guessing that it is the same vintage as my television, given its bulk and the faux woodgrain box. Matches my decor nicely.
2) Got a hand-me-down digital camera from my beautiful and amazing friend Kana. Thanks so much! *kiss*kiss* Will finally be able to post pictures. But not yet. Need to buy a drive for my hand-me-down laptop first.

hiatus

Going to be giving the blog a rest for a few weeks. Too darned busy. Have two good friends in town right now (count 'em!) and heading to Calgary to visit my brother and my favourite nephews next week. Then driving back 12 hours with all of them, and hanging out in Brandon for a week.

Then going camping with the girls.

So... not sure when I'll be back. Hope you all enjoy July as much as I plan to!

Food Week

This will be the one and only post here this week, as I'm busy doing a series of posts on food, health and the environment over on Green Brandon. Check it out!

Friday quickie

Got off to a rough start today after a bad night with little sleep. First I was too cold, then I put on another blanket and was too hot. Then I dreamed a lot of crazy dreams. Then the cats woke me at 5am wanting breakfast.

Despite this, I look great. For some reason, I'm having a good hair day. The humidity (as opposed to the humility) is just right. There is a balance between "done" and "unkempt." The hair gods are smiling upon me. Usually it only looks this good for the hour after I leave Mama's D's chair.

So, with a foggy brain topped by lovely locks, I head into Winnipeg for the weekend. I'm afraid O won't get a chance to see me in all my glory as I have 2.5 hours of dozing on the Greyhound to get through. Hopefully I won't have to sit by anyone smelly.

hand-me-downs

Thinking about my friend Tracy today. After she had her second child, she discovered that her feet had gotten bigger (I had no idea this could happen) and she was kind enough to send me two pairs of shoes that she could no longer wear. Both of them were on my feet today. I've been hiking back and forth to work wearing these cool kid hip hop sneakers, called Invicible Jane. (Mine/Tracy's are in black.)

Once I arrived, I changed into a pair of Nine West open-toe sling-backs with lovely beading. Had to look professional as there was a big meeting at work today (my last, as my boss is now back!), and these shoes worked perfectly with my trousers. Was generally feeling very grateful that I know such a generous person, and that said person has such great taste.

I have been in hand-me-down heaven lately. My dear friend Kana moved to New York in December and dropped off tons of kitchen supplies. Half empty (or is that full?) bottles of booze, spices, oil and all sorts of other goodies. My amazing friend Karen shipped me her old stereo and laptop, because she had new ones and I didn't have any. My darling baby (but taller) sister has kindly shrunk many great clothes over the years, which have convenietly become my size instead of hers.

Hand-me-downs are the ultimate in recycling. When you throw a can in the bin, do you get the feeling that you are making someone really happy? Nooooo. Do you get the satisfaction of knowing that your much loved item has gone to a good home? Nope again.

So, in case you were wondering, I take size 9 shoes, size 10 regular pants, medium tops and I could use a VCR as the old one my mom gave me finally died.

olay olay olay

World Cup started today. Love the 'net. Got play-by-play on the Germany-Costa Rica match thanks to World Cup Blog. Couldn't find anyplace to listen to the game, but that's okay. According to comments posted on the blog, the sites broadcasting the match were so bogged down they weren't working properly. Not a surprise. Heard on the radio this morning that 500 million people worldwide watch each game, and that over the next month, 3 billion people will catch at least one game. Quite the marketing opportunity, I'm sure.

Heading to my mom's at 6:30 to watch the Germany game on replay. Even though I know the outcome, I'm totally pumped.

In non-futbol news, have a busy weekend planned. Watching the Traveller's Day Parade tomorrow morning as my mom will be in it, walking beside the Waves of Hope dragon boat. In the afternoon, I have friends coming into town from the big city. They are apparently picking up a dog, which they will hopefully do before stopping by for a visit. I want to play with the puppy. Cleo won't be thrilled.

Sunday, it's clean, clean, clean. And watch more soccer.

Seven

Mama D just tagged me, so here goes...

7 things I want to do before I die:

• Graduate. First from undergrad (after 6 long years... sigh), then from Library Science.
• Live in one place long enough to watch my garden mature.
• Get out of debt. HA! Ya, right.
• Finally take a trip to L.A. to visit those bugs and swim in their pool.
• Go on a road trip with my brother and his kids. Oh wait... I'm doing that in July.
• Go to Greece and stuff myself silly on their amazing cuisine, while getting drunk on retsina.
• Actually attend World Cup. I've got the fever from afar this year.

7 Things I can't do:

• Sing. Okay, I can sing, just not in tune.
• Paint pretty pictures. Walls? I'm brilliant.
• Scale high buildings, or do anything that requires me to be more than 6 feet off the ground.
• Kill insects, even the "bad" ones. It all goes back to the spruce bud worm infestation of '79. How do I deal? Catch and release.
• Weird. I can only think of four things. So I guess number 5 is complete this list.

7 things that attracted me to my spouse:
Well, we aren't actually married. And we met at a party when I mistook him for someone else, so I'm not sure if you could say I was attracted to him. Though he doesn't really look like the other guy. How about 7 things I find attractive?

• The sideburns, baby!
• His good manners.
• The fact that he is a grammar freak.
• Our banter.
• His goofy sense of humour.
• His amazing kisses.
• Pretty much everything else.

7 Things I say often:

• Bye, baby. (Since we live in different cities, I say this to O every night on the phone)
• Cleo-eo-eo-eo-eo (Cat greeting No. 1 when I arrive home each day)
• Mewdles! (Cat greeting No. 2 when I arrive home each day)
• That sucks.
• Hey? (As opposed to "Eh?")
• Howdy! (Standard non-cat greeting)
• Goddamn (with foot stamp)

7 Books I love:

• Everything by Roddy Doyle.
• We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver (Be prepared to be horrified.)
• After You'd Gone by Maggie O'Farrell (If you take this as a recommended reading list, this one comes with a warning. You will need at least one box of tissues.)
• Emma by Jane Austin
• Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austin
• Franny & Zoe by J.D. Salinger
• To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (Number one fave. Everyone should read it.)

7 Movies I could watch over and over again

• Ghost Dog: Way of the Samurai
• Down By Law
• The Princess Bride
• Mediterraneo
• Betty Blue
• Breakfast at Tiffany's (despite stoopid Mickey Rooney)
• Amelie

7 People who I'm going to tag!

How about...
The Bee
Claw of the Conciliator

Like Mama D, I don't have that many bloggy friends.

Oh, heck. Let's tag The Wood Between the Worlds as well.

Green Brandon has moved

I set up a site meter on Green Brandon a couple of weeks ago (thanks to help from Mama D) and found that practically no one was looking at it. Thought about whether I should keep it up, and if so, was Blogger the best place to host it?

Then I discovered that eBrandon is now hosting blogs. So GB has a new home. I don't like the look and useability of the site, but it seems more appropriate for the type of info I'm posting there. We'll see how long I last. I don't think I can deal with too many negative comments! Some of the stuff in the discussion forum is quite nasty. Why can't we all play nice???

My first post there is on Environment Week, which starts tomorrow. My workplace is taking part in the Commuter Challenge, though I personally am not. They have it set up so that you are supposed to take a different form of green transportation each day. No way I'm spending 45 minutes on the bus when it only takes me 12 minutes to walk. In any cse, it's cool that they are doing it.

The high price of gas is sure to get more people participating. I've noticed some very strange changes in Brandon this spring. A lot (and I mean A LOT) more people seem to be riding their bikes. And there are suddenly a bunch of scooters on the road as well as four (count 'em) Smart Cars in town. One of them is totally souped up.

All the scooters whizzing by are making me want two motorized wheels. It will have to remain a dream for now, but I can definitely see one in my future. Maybe an electric scooter. And I don't mean one of these.

Computer Drop-Off Day

Celebrate Environment Week with Westman Recycling
Saturday, June 3
22 – 11th Street

• Computer, cell phone, printer cartridge drop-off
  10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.

• Computers – only monitor and CPU (tower) accepted.
  Phones and cartridges support Samaritan House.

• Enjoy a hot dog and drink for $1
  11:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m.

Location: CMHA Re-Store, 22 – 11th Street

mixed tape

I haven't had time to really process Greg's death, but I've thought of nothing else since I heard the news. It has stirred up all sorts of feelings about friendship, love, the symbolic meaning attached to relationships. About quality of life. About death and grief. I need time to deal with my thoughts and emotions.

Therefore, today's post (since it has been a while) is going to be frivolous. I'm not ready to write about the other stuff, and that's all I've had on my mind.

So, in no particular order, 10 songs I'll always love...

1. Veronica by Elvis Costello
O and I were listening to this tape the morning I heard that Greg was gone. I woke up with the lyrics "do the days fly by? did the favors wane?" in my head and it took me ages to figure out what they were from. Unfortunately, they work really well to the tune of Harvest by Neil Young, so that got me off track. If it wasn't for the Archie comics association, I'd consider Veronica as a name for a future daughter. Or cat. That's how much I love this song.

2. Pressure Drop by Toots and the Maytals
Fact is, I like reggae. A lot. I like Toots, too. I never get sick of him. And this is one of his that I like more than everything else. Ya, ya, The Clash and The Specials have made good versions, but nothing beats the original.

3. Train in Vain by the Clash
Speaking of The Clash. "You say you stand, duh-duh-duh, by your man, duh-duh-duh..." It isn't even playing (except in my head) and I want to get up and dance.

4. Innocent When You Dream (Barroom version) by Tom Waits
I'm a sucker for Tom Waits, singing low and powerful, but add a drunken swagger to the delivery, and I swoon. Beautiful. Beautiful.

5. Under Pressure by David Bowie and Freddy Mercury
I'm not sure that I can explain why this one is one the list. Do I need to? Do y'all get it?

6. Victoria by The Fall
The Fall can be a difficult band to love, but even those (like O) who appreciate them but don't love them, must agree that this is a great song. Love the glass smashing, love the lyrics, love the beat, love the melody. And heck, Mark E. Smith is practically singing.

7. You Make Me Want to Wear Dresses by Lisa Germano
This one always takes me back to the summer of 1994. I was working at Candlewood books in Brandon. My bestest friend and I got all dolled up and drove into the big city in my boyfriend's Mercury Meteor. This song reminds me of the prairies, of long summer days, of hot wind on bare legs. Of my boss, Don, unable to get this tune out of his head (if you know what he looks like, you'll understand how hilarious this is). And I do love to wear dresses.

8. No Woman, No Cry by Bob Marley
This songs comes on? Woman, cry. It's embarassing, but it happens every time. I can't explain why. I have no particular sentimental attachmentment. The wail at the beginning gets me misty, and by the "everythings gonna be alright" I'm a river.

9. Straight to You by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
There are plenty of Nick Cave songs that I will never tire of, but I regularly come back to this one. Boatman's Call reminds me of breaking up with Warren and all the sorrow and regret that went along with moving out of our home. Somethings Got a Hold of My Heart will always overwhelm me with teenage angst. The Ship Song is about O and everything I thought we could be to each other back then. But this song has no baggage. I can belt it out with abandon. (And I do.)

10. Heart of Gold by Neil Young
Just love this song. 'Nuff said.

Bonus Track: Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen
Like all of Cohen's songs, I prefer them when they are performed by someone else. The John Cale version, off the tribute album I'm Your Fan, is the one that gets me every time.

How do we control mosquitos in Brandon?

Brandon & Area Environmental Council presents:

“Understanding our Environment Speaker Series”

How do we control mosquitos in Brandon and surrounding communities?
Presentation by Bill Galloway B.Sc. M.Sc., Zoology Department, BU

Sunday May 28, 2006 2pm . Main Floor Classroom, Health Studies Building, B.U.

Renew your membership and buy a BAEC Earth Day t-shirt.

Contact: Dr. Bill Paton, President BAEC 727-9783
Patonw(at)Brandonu(dot)ca

saying goodbye

My lovely and amazing friend Greg died on Friday, around midnight Vancouver-time. I heard the news yesterday from my mom, who had heard from a friend who lives in the same small town as Greg's mom. This news did not come as a shock. I've been saying goodbye to Greg since 1994.

Greg and I met in 1989. I was on the 60 bus going to university. He got on one stop after I did and as he was making his way to a seat, the bus lurched and he stumbled, landing hard with muddy boots on my feet. He began apologizing profusely while he knelt down in front of me and cleaned my boots with his sleeve. I was a bit taken aback. Even more so when he sat down beside me. We talked the entire half hour ride and were friends ever after. I remember what he was wearing, he made such an impression that day... a navy blue shirt with cream pokadots.

Greg and I ate, drank and danced our way through that year, while I went through such events as flunking out of school and meeting O. We ate, drank and danced our way through the years that followed. My move to Vancouver didn't dampen our friendship. He sent me the most fantastic and hilarious homemade postcards. I was soon back in Winnipeg, and we picked up where we left off. I discovered at some point that he was diabetic. I felt pangs of guilt when I considered how much alcohol we had downed together. I knew what having diabetes meant. But he didn't seem concerned, so I decided not to be concerned. I wonder now if I could have changed anything or if it would have been worth it to try. I can't imagine that it would have had any effect except to put a wedge between us.

In 1994, Greg told me he was HIV positive. I was stunned and in tears, afraid for my friend. He told me that it was okay... he never expected to live a long life anyway. He was not trying to buck me up, that was truly how he felt. Despite the diagnosis, or perhaps because of it, we went out dancing as planned and we had a great time.

Greg moved to Vancouver a couple of years later. We stayed in touch, but not as much as previously. Every time I went to the West Coast, we hung out together. It was always so easy to pick up with him. Nothing changed between us. We loved each other as much as always.

Two years ago, his diabetes started to cause him serious problems. He had several small strokes. He went into shock and nearly died. He had kidney failure. Ironically, his HIV positive status was the best thing for him. It meant that when he was no longer able to live on his own, he could move into The Dr. Peter Centre. It was there that he lived out the rest of his life.

I was in Vancouver in November, over the Remembrance Day long weekend. Greg was in the hospital with pneumonia. He had lost part of his foot due to complications from the diabetes. I went to visit him each of the four days I was there. As always, and despite everything, it was so good to see him and talk to him, to lean up against him and put my arms around him. The last time we spoke, I said I'd come visit again when I could. He told me that there might not be a next time. And there wasn't.

A friend visited in February and reported back that he was doing really well. That's the way it went these last years. He did well, then poorly, then well. When he died, he was in the hospital with pneumonia again. He choked and they were unable to clear his lungs. His mother and brother were called and he died with them beside him.

I've been feeling profoundly sad, but also a little relieved, since hearing the news. Greg's quality of life had seriously diminished, and I can't imagine that he would have wanted to linger on. I know he was resigned to his death, that the bitterness he had once felt was no longer consuming him. Mostly I feel thankful that I had seventeen years with him in my life. He was terribly funny, extremely talented and one of the most beautiful people I've ever met. Rest in Peace, my dear friend.

Green Landscaping Brochure

Green Landscaping: Seven Principles

Use minimal water to create a healthy yard Quick Facts:
Water demand is highest during the summer growing season, mainly due to lawn watering.
Typically, 50% of the water consumed by a single family household during the growing season is used to irrigate lawn and garden areas.

1. Planning and Design
Consider:
Site characteristics: drainage, sun, shade, wind, slopes, noise, privacy.
Your needs and wants: garden, entertainment, service, and play areas.
Draw your plan on paper: measure your yard, and include structures and plants you will be keeping. Then try various ideas on paper.

2. Soil
Most plants grow best in loamy soil that drains well and contains organic material.
If your plants are not doing as well as you would expect, a soil analysis may help in determining your problem. Call an accredited lab for information.

3. Reduce Turf Area
Decide how much lawn area you want. Then, gradually reduce the excess by removing the lawn and replanting with appropriate low maintenance plants.

4. Irrigation
If you do have to irrigate, water deeply, but not often.
The larger the drop size, the less evaporation will occur. Apply the water as close to the ground as possible. If water begins to pond while watering, water for 15 minute intervals until the needed water has been applied.
Minimize your need for irrigation. Group plants according to their water needs, and according to the attributes of the area of your yard. If you have one area which is extremely hot and dry, use drought tolerant species. However, if you have an area that is always damp or wet, consider using plants that grow well in that environment.

5. Mulches
Mulching assists soil in retaining moisture, reducing weed growth and preventing erosion. Anything from straw, grass clippings, leaves or newspaper to wood chips, pine cones, compost or peat moss can be used as a mulch. Apply the mulch 3 to 4 inches thick, ensuring the mulch does not touch the stalks or trunks of plants.

6. Plant Selection
Choose plants that are appropriate for the area of your yard (sun versus shade, dry versus wet, etc.).
Consider size, colour, and texture of the plants.
Plants native to your area are already adapted to the climate. In addition, many are perennial or self-seeding, reducing future costs for new plants. Many native plants will also support indigenous animals, such as butterflies and birds.

7. Maintenance
Low-water landscaped areas are intended to require low maintenance. However, this does mean some upkeep must still be done. Some of the tasks include:
Adding mulch yearly.
Amending flower and vegetable beds.
Pruning trees and shrubs.
Dividing and transplant perennials as required.
Cutting down perennial tops.
Ensuring nutrients in soil are adequate for the plants in that area.
Weeding as necessary.

Lawns
Ensure grass is a drought resistant variety.
Grass cut 7.5 to 10 cm long requires less water because roots, new growth and soil are shaded.
Water the garden in the morning when there is little wind to minimize evaporation.
Only water the garden, not the sidewalk, road or neighbour's deck.
Buy a timer for your outside faucet, or use a kitchen timer as a reminder to turn water off.
Use a soil moisture indicator for your lawn, or measure rain and sprinkler water in a container. Three centimetres of water per week is usually enough.
Aerate your lawn regularly.
Use a watering can with water from your rain barrel for plants that need extra water.
Encourage children to use water toys and a splash pool, rather than a hose or a sprinkler, to keep cool. Use the water from the splash pool for your garden.

Other Outdoor Hints
Use a broom, not a hose, to clean sidewalks and driveways.
Wash your car with a bucket of soapy water; only use the hose for rinsing.
Repair any leaks in your hose or connections.

For More Information, Please Contact:
Water Use Efficiency Coordinator
Pollution Prevention
Manitoba Environment
123 Main Street, Suite 160
Winnipeg MB R3C 1A5
Phone: 1-800-282-8069 ext. 8980

Community Shared Agriculture

What is Community Shared Agriculture?
CSA is a system of growing and distributing organic produce which restores the link between farmers and consumers. CSA is ecologically sound. Produce is grown organically. CSA is socially just, striving to foster trust and build community by directly linking consumers and producers. CSA is economically viable, enabling the risks associated with farming and the care and well-being of our land to be shared by all. Money stays within the local community.

How does it work?
You purchase a share of the growers harvest in the spring. Once a week during the growing season (12-14 weeks), fresh picked fruits and vegetables are delivered to a designated place. Members are encouraged to get involved. Come out for a tour, or for weeding and harvesting.

How do I get involved?
In Brandon, we are lucky to have to CSA projects. This year they are growing apples, Asian greens, beans, beets, broccoli, cabbage, carrots, corn, cucumbers, garlic, herbs, lettuce, muskmelons, onions, peas, parsnip, pepers, potatoes, pumpkin, raspberries, rhubarb, spinach, squash, swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips, watermelon and zucchini.

Aagaard Farms
Tel: 727-3788
Email: norette(at)yahoo(dot)com
Aaggard Farms is a family run market garden that was started 25 years ago. It is now operated by the second generation of the family, Jes Aagaard and his partner Norah Tolmie. They offer garden plots, U-Pick, CSA as well as selling produce at the Riverbank Discovery Centre Farmer's Market.

Country Gate Gardens
Tel: Menno at 728-2909 or Linda at 724-7422
Email: meisaac(at)mts(dot)net or raven(at)xplornet(dot)com

further to yesterday's post

I heard back from the editor this morning. He "forgot" to run the article. At first, I was feeling pretty angry, but you know... maybe he did. It's not like I've never done anything like that before, right?

I told him he could make it up to me by running an article for Women's Health Day in June. No reply yet, but I'm guessing he'll be accomodating.

National Day Against Homophobia

Ahhh…. The good ol’ Brandon Sun (or BS, as I like to call it.) Over a month ago, I contacted the editor on behalf of the Sexual Health Committee (which I sit on) about running an article for the National Day Against Homophobia on the topic of homophobia in the workplace. Direct quote from the editor: “That sounds fantastic.” I spent many hours working on the article (I knew the facts, but I wanted to get the tone right, so I kept fiddling with it) and got it to the editor a week ago as he had requested. Today, I grabbed the paper to see the article. Can you guess where this is going? Right. It had not been printed.

Our other local paper, the weekly Wheat City Journal, also agreed to run an article. It was also submitted well in advance of the deadline, but it did not appear in last Thursdays edition. It (supposedly) will run tomorrow. A day late.

The posters for this year’s campaign say that homophobia is becoming more subtle. As subtle as, say, newspaper editors suppressing stories about the day that is supposed to bring awareness to the problem? Just in case you are thinking that Brandon sucks when it comes to these kinds of issues, the local television station had myself, another member of the Sexual Health Committee and a local gay activist on the Noon Hour Show on Monday. My bit was mercifully short. The program was excellent. The host personally knew the activist, so she was very frank about what she was asking, but also very supportive in the way she framed questions. The Sexual Health Committee is also running Ally Training today, and have 30 people signed up from various workplaces.

Since the BS didn’t print my article, I’ll do it myself. Here it is in all its glory:

May 17th is the National Day Against Homophobia. The purpose of this annual event is to raise awareness of homophobia’s harmful effects and to work against exclusion. This year, the campaign targets homophobia in the workplace. Employers, co-workers, unions, corporations and professional organizations all play a role in creating a respectful and prejudice-free work environment.

What is Homophobia?
Homophobia is a negative attitude, feeling or behaviour towards those who are not heterosexual, which includes individuals who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or two-spirited. Homophobia takes on many forms in the workplace and it is becoming more subtle. Homophobia is: not hiring someone because you suspect they are not heterosexual, denying opportunities because of sexual orientation, harassment or violence, homophobic comments, jokes or slurs, shunning, insinuations, insults or threats. Homophobia creates feelings of isolation and fear.

What are Our Rights and Responsibilities?
The Manitoba Human Rights Code and the Canadian Human Rights Act protect employees from being discriminated against because of their sexual orientation, national or ethnic origin, sex, age, marital status, or religion. Employers cannot refuse to hire or continue to employ a person, treat an employee differently from others, exclude employees from membership in an organization, or pay lower wages based on the employee’s actual or presumed sexual orientation. It is the employer’s responsibility to make sure that personal information is kept confidential. Employers must also protect their employees from discrimination or harassment.

Although legal protections are in place, discrimination often goes unseen or unchallenged. There may be a lack of understanding and awareness, or a fear of being singled out. Everyone is affected by homophobia, and it is up to the employer and all employees to build a culture of respect.

Ways to Create a Respectful Workplace
Implement anti-discrimination or anti-harassment policies
Offer awareness training on human rights issues
Invite significant others work-related social events
Have a benefit package that acknowledges same-sex relationships
Equally acknowledge the relationships of your co-workers, colleagues, or clients by ensuring, for example, that anniversaries, births, and marriages/union ceremonies are celebrated in the same way, and that all partners are acknowledged
Report incidents of inappropriate behaviour
Question your own stereotypes and learn more about others
Value the contributions that different points of view can bring to your workplace

Where to Get More Information
Another way to foster a safe and positive work environment is to provide Ally training. An Ally is someone who is informed about and is sensitive towards those who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or two-spirited, is understanding of their issues, and affirms their experiences and rights. Those who complete the training program in good faith and have a genuine interest in the goals and mission of the program are encouraged to become an Ally, but there is no obligation. Contact the Sexuality Education Resource Centre for additional resources and information about Diversity Training for your organization, business, or school.

Canada Road Safety Week

May 16 – 22 Canada Road Safety Week. Transportation Canada's vision is to make our roads the safest in the world by 2010, but a quick look around their website reveals that they are talking about making the roads safe for those who drive cars, not bicycles.

With gas prices soaring, more people are choosing two wheels instead of four. So what can those of us who choose pedal power do to ensure our safety?

First and foremost, we need to act like we are vehicles, because we are. The City of Brandon Bicycle Bylaw (Pt III, Sec 6.2: pg 20) and Fines (Pt V, Sec. 56.2: pg 60) are available online. If we behave like cars, it helps other drivers know what to expect of us. Don’t ride facing into traffic. Use signals. Stop at stop signs. Stay in your lane. And don’t let road rage get the best of you!

The rest of it is stuff you already know. Be visible. Wear a helmet. Don't wear headphones. Don't talk on your cell phone (?!?). Okay, I'll stop lecturing.

Biking Toronto has 8 Secrets to Cycling in Traffic that are worth checking out. Be sure to read the comments too. Not that we face the same crazy traffic that Toronto bikers do!

Bill to Ban Non-Essential Use of Pesticides

Winnipeg M.P. Pat Martin tabled a bill in the House of Commons calling for a nationwide ban on all cosmetic used of pesticides and herbicides. He cited the growing list of neurological diseases, cancers and reproductive disorders found in the population, particularly in children and pregnant women. The bill would place the onus on the chemical companies to prove that their products are safe before they would be allowed back on store shelves, rather than government and health officials having to prove they are harmful before they are removed.

Ninety municipalities throughout Canada, including all of Quebec, have banned the cosmetic use of pesticides. Brandon is the only city in Manitoba to have done so.

The bill does not ban pesticides for agricultural or commercial use, but if the bill is implemented, Martin says it would reduce overall pesticide use by 40%.
(Taken from The Herald. Please see MP Wants Nationwide Pesticide Ban for the full story.)

Please show your support for this bill by emailing Merv Tweed, MP for Brandon-Souris and asking him to request that this private members bill be brought forward for debate in the House of Common.
Merv Tweed M.P., Brandon-Souris email: Tweed.M@parl.gc.ca

Here are some other MPs you may wish to contact:
Prime Minister Stephen Harper email: Harper.S@parl.gc.ca
Bill Graham M.P. email: Graham.B@parl.gc.ca
Jack Layton M.P. email: Layton.J@parl.gc.ca
Gilles Duceppe M.P. email: Duceppe.G@parl.gc.ca
Minister of the Environment, Rona Ambrose M.P. email: Ambrose.R@parl.gc.ca
Minister of Health, Tony Clement M.P. email: Clement.T@parl.gc.ca